"Potentially Harmful Bacteria"

Joke of the Day: The Gateway Arch in St. Louis was found to be showing signs of rust and decay. It's big, in St. Louis, and showing signs of rust and decay. Kind of like the Rams.

North Dakota has the lowest unemployment rate in the country at 3.6%. Who knew it would be easy to find a job in the middle of nowhere?

Lindsay Lohan’s dad is defending the behavior of Mel Gibson. That brings the total number of people on Mel Gibson's side to two.

Lindsay Lohan’s dad is defending the behavior of Mel Gibson. Of all people...

California is suing “Tax Lady” Roni Lynn Deutch for $34 Million, saying she swindled thousands of customers. They do realize she is a "Tax" Lady right?

Ham that was distributed to Walmart delicatessens nationwide and sold in sandwiches has been recalled because it might be tainted with potentially harmful bacteria. Considering all the food recalls, the unnamed character in "Green Eggs and Ham" was right to refuse the meal.

House Republican leader John Boehner on Tuesday urged President Barack Obama to support an extension of tax cuts and to fire key economic advisers, arguing that 19 month of "government as community organizer" hasn't worked. Well gee, thanks John Boehner. I'm sure everybody has figured that out by now.

Amsterdam police have found 7,000 kg of marijuana and hashish in a warehouse near Schiphol Airport in the Netherlands. The warehouse door read the initials A.W., for Amy Winehouse.

A newly discovered type of oil-eating microbe is suddenly flourishing in the Gulf of Mexico. To which BP said, "Yes. That was totally our idea. You can thank us.".

That's all I have for today. More coming tomorrow on my first day of school.