Tuesday, February 15, 2011

"Free Condoms"

Barbie and Ken are reportedly back together. God, I haven't seen so much controversy regarding the relationship between two plastic douches since Heidi and Spencer.

McDonald's restaurants in Hong Kong are allowing couples to get married with "McWeddings". To the couples getting married at "McWeddings": Do you have any McClass?

New York City has a new app that helps cellphone users find a location distributing free condoms. Of course, Los Angeles has the exact same thing. It's called "a map to Charlie Sheen's house".

An Oregon man who videotaped his car’s speedometer hitting 140-mph was arrested and jailed. He was charged with going nowhere fast.

Maine lawmakers are about to name the whoopie pie as the state’s official treat. If that's the case, what is Maine's official cushion?

A new book says the 33 trapped Chilean miners considered suicide and cannibalism, then later demanded sex toys. They were not able to get the sex toys because, of course, they were miners.

Billy Ray Cyrus says he wishes the Disney show “Hannah Montana” had never been started. Billy, I feel your pain. We all feel that way.

Real estate mogul Donald Trump says he is interested in investing in the New York Mets. I thought he was known to make good investments.

An Illinois woman is being accused of updating her Facebook status while driving when she hit and killed a pedestrian. At the autopsy, the coroner wrote "It's complicated" right next to cause of death.

Two Senators are asking Major League Baseball to ban smokeless tobacco. Wouldn't chew think that would be a huge benefit?

O.J. Simpson was reportedly seriously beaten in prison. I guess "The Juice" got juiced.

Lindsay Lohan will read the Top Ten list on the Late Show with David Letterman. It's fairly likely that she will literally steal the show.

That's all I have for today! More tomorrow!

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