"That Hopey Changey Thing"

Hello to my limited supply of readers! These are my jokes for February 6, 2010!

Sarah Palin is saying the policies of President Barack Obama and Democratic leaders in Congress will be short-lived. Actually, she had to say that. That was part of her contract with FOX News.

A Louisiana high school student was sent home for wearing an Indianapolis Colts jersey to school. No, not because it was a Colts jersey, but because the shoulder had a "Super Bowl Champions 2010" patch.

Sarah Palin had some pointed advice to President Barack Obama on Saturday night: "Stop lecturing and start listening." To which Obama said, "Right back atcha".

Sarah Palin also told Obama, "How's that hopey changey thing working out for you?" Sadly, that was the most intelligent grammar she had all night.

A 13 year old football player has committed to play at USC starting in 2015. He has to wait until 2015? USC would be better off if he came now.

NASCAR driver Kyle Busch proposed to his girlfriend on the track at Daytona International Speedway. To which NASCAR fans said, "Awww... Now they ain't just cuzins no more are they?"

Washington DC was hit by three feet of snow today. No wonder Chris Matthews forgot that President Obama was black. He was covered in snow.

Pete Wentz says talk of Fall Out Boy's demise has been blown out of proportion — but he isn't sure when the rock band will performing together again. Now I know where "Fall Out" came from.

Eagle protection agencies have been seeing eagles that are oddly sick because of food they ate. It's gotten so bad that instead of bird poop landing on people, it has been bird puke.

Jersey Shore is all about fake boobs, drunk people, abs, and hookups. Jersey Shore? Why not call it "Jersey Whores"?

Well that's it everyone! Thanks for reading!