Wednesday, April 14, 2010

"Ticketed For Speeding"

Joke of the Day: Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee says the effort to allow gays and lesbians to marry is like allowing incest, polygamy, and drug use. So basically he compared the gay marriage issue to Alabama, Utah, and California.

In Argentina, two escaped convicts hid from authorities by disguising themselves as sheep. If you are in Argentina, the sheep really can hit the fan.

Forty-seven year old former NFL star Jerry Rice says he’s going to try to play professional golf. It sounds like somebody has a little trouble meeting the ladies.

Ministers and legislators in Lebanon played soccer together Tuesday to mark a special anniversary in that country. If that same thing happened in America, we'd almost be celebrating anti-celibacy.

Members of the New York Yankees were presented their championship rings Tuesday for winning last season’s World Series. The scary part of this: This was followed by Yankees players handing the presenters checks.

The "Twilight" book series is on a list of challenged books. No teenage girl has confirmed submitting a complaint about it.

A new study says that frequent password changes are useless and a big waste of time. You know, like the modern-day KKK.

Actor Aiden Turner of "All My Children" was eliminated from Dancing With The Stars. Turner can now go back to "All My Children", unlike Kate Gosselin.

28 states are considering expanding the authority of nurse practitioners. In a related story, Bill Clinton has announced that he is still extremely sick.

A new study says that the quality of nurse care is equal to that of doctor care. However, the nurses get the nod when it comes to guys getting a physical.

Sarah Palin truly is a hockey mom. In fact, all her children play the same position: Right Wing.

A driving instructor in France has been ticketed for speeding. Really? That's like the President of "Say No!" being arrested in a major drug ring.

Trash collected from the world’s waterways in one day last year netted 26,000 condoms and two million cigarette butts. And that was just from the Jersey Shore.

Toyota will stop selling its Lexus GX 460 SUV. Toyota finally realized that the last thing drivers want on the road is another Toyota.

These jokes were pretty good! More coming later!

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