Friday, March 5, 2010

"A Tax On Clothing"

A study says that baseball players are getting fatter, with 55% of major leaguers at least borderline overweight. This was discovered when people realized that baseball barely involves any physical activity.

The Center for Disease Control says that home births are on the rise. Does this mean that being born at home is a disease?

A study says that obesity and depression are interrelated. That's because tons of people are depressed about being fat.

A candidate for Governor of Minnesota is calling for a tax on clothing. Considering how cold it is in Minnesota, this person will get all of zero votes.

American Airlines flight attendants are threatening to go on strike. They are ticked off because the pilots are hogging all the alcohol.

China says it expects its economy to grow 8% this year. Now, China will have enough money to invest in more lead.

The American Cancer Society says some of the traditional tests for prostate cancer may not be necessary. I guess somebody just realized what a prostate exam consists of.

Appearing on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Brett Favre said he was not certain he’d be back next season. This is the world's greatest example of history repeating itself.

Olympic gold medalist Lindsay Vonn will soon appear on boxes of Wheaties. Wheaties - the Breakfast of Champions (of Wipeout).

Police said a cook put a body hair in the bagel sandwich of a police officer who had given him tickets in the past. This is actually a valuable lesson to us all. Never get any ideas from Family Guy.

That's it for today! More tomorrow!

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