"Riddled With Errors"

Joke of the Day: Former “American Idol” winner Fantasia Barrino has been awarded her high school diploma. Even her former high school classmates are going, "Who is she again?".

The shares of BP dropped sharply in London amid a massive sell off. Don't they mean a massive oil spill?

CNBC financial host Suze Orman underwent an emergency appendectomy and had to have her appendix removed on Saturday. Apparently her appendix was suffering from heat exhaustion under her flashy jackets.

The Democrat Senate candidate in South Carolina is a 32-year-old man who lives with his parents and who’s been charged with showing obscene photos to a college woman. This guy was born to be a Senator.

A new survey found that 3 out of 4 Americans still believe that global warming is occurring. The other person didn't have Al Gore put a gun to their head.

Scientists say that the sun is about to become much more active, producing numerous sun spots. These scientists work for the Al Gore Institute.

New research from Britain found that an unmade bed may be unappealing to dust mites and thus may be healthier than one that is made. Apparently these researchers are not parents.

Boston Celtics guard Ray Allen was 0-for-13 from the field Tuesday night against the Lakers in the NBA championship series. Even BP was giving him advice on how to perform better.

British Petroleum’s 582 page plan for oil spills was riddled with errors and omissions, according to an analysis. Or, as CEO Tony Hayward calls it, "Perfect".

The oldest leather shoe ever found was discovered in Armenia. To which Larry King said, "I've been looking for that!".

A woman on a Continental Airlines flight from Israel to Newark, New Jersey says she was drugged and robbed on the flight. That sounds like something your health insurance company would do to you.

A 600 pound New Jersey woman wants to become the world’s fattest woman by making it to 1,000 pounds. I'm sure her parents will be so proud.

That's all for today! I hope I have more jokes tomorrow!