"A Black Eye"

Actor Hugh Jackman got a black eye while doing a stunt on the Oprah Show taping in Australia. In fact, Oprah was feeling generous that day, so she gave everyone in the audience a black eye.

Media mogul Ted Turner says he’s “almost to the edge of poverty”. Gosh, give one red-haired crazy guy a show on your network and this happens.

The wife of Cliff Lee, who just signed a big contract with the Phillies, said she was insulted by rude Yankees fans while in New York. If she didn't know Yankees fans were rude, she must be from another planet.

The game show “Jeopardy” will pit two human contestants against an IBM computer. You know how to beat that computer? Forget to program the words "what is" into the computer.

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has been named Time Magazine's Person of the Year. To which Zuckerberg said, "Umm... Like!".

Elin Nordegren reportedly has a new boyfriend. Fortunately for the new boyfriend, he doesn't golf.

Cincinnati Bengals WR Terrell Owens is blaming the coaches for their 2-11 start. Here's my question: are the coaches the ones on the field?

The Minnesota Vikings are hoping that Brett Favre can return this season. So are all of his opponents.

Chicago Cubs legend Ron Santo has died at the age of 70. "Chicago Cubs legend" is one of those ironies, like "Charlie Sheen's sobriety".

Larry King is in his final week of his show at CNN. That's what his viewers have been thinking for years.

There's a new iPhone app that helps report “suspicious behavior”. It's called "Your Internet History".

French authorities have seized 354 fake Faberge eggs. They knew the eggs were fake when they didn't have any salmonella.

A global study says that money doesn't buy happiness. Try telling that to the people on MTV Cribs.

Less education and income is linked with obesity in women and not men. Also linked with less educaation and income: an appearance on COPS.

A study says that wearing ugly underwear can ruin a woman's day. Especially when they meet men.

A study says that lack of sleep can hurt a person's looks. You know what that means? I haven't had a wink of sleep in months.

That's all for right now! More later!

"Working While Sick"

Police in North Dakota arrested a woman who allegedly walked into a drugstore wearing only a thong, pasties, a small towel and whipped cream. It turns out, it was just Paris Hilton looking for more prescription pain killers.

The American woman released by Iran after more than a year in prison said she was grateful to Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad for her freedom. Of course, saying that was a part of her plea deal.

A firm handshake could be a sign of a longer life expectancy, according to British researchers. Unless you happen to introduce yourself to Mr. Death.

Justin Bieber is reportedly "trying to stay single". In an unrelated story, the suicide rate of desperate teenage girls has sharply increased.

A new study says that doctors are actually working while sick. Isn't that like an obese nutritionist?

Researchers say that cancer patients who die at home do so more peacefully. Coincidentally, the researchers are the ones paying for the treatment.

A University of Delaware graduate student has become the biggest one-day winner in the history of the game show "Jeopardy!". This is sure to be a huge hit in the Guinness Book Of Nerd Records.

A study says that more popular people tend to catch the flu before others because they are around so many people. In that case, why are the nerds always sick?

A poll says investors are wary of stock trading and feel that the market is not a fair place to put their money. The same poll said that french fries are bad for you.

The Pentagon says they will start weighing whether something is affordable before buying it. If it works, President Obama said that he may even try it.

President Obama is telling students to ignore bullies and to treat each other with kindness and respect. Unfortunately, that was the speech he was going to deliver to FOX News.

A study says that a gloomy personality may increase the risk of heart problems. Well that ought to cheer them up.

A study says that selfish people can actually benefit society overall. That's what Wall Street has been telling us all along.

LeBron James is listed as the sixth most unpopular professional athlete. Apparently this poll was not given in Miami.

A study by the University of Rochester says that people who play action video games tend to be better at making quick and accurate decisions. Except when it comes to women.

That's all for today! More coming tomorrow!