"Trapped In Her Bathroom"

Facebook is about to trademark the word “face”. In an unrelated story, I am trademarking the word "fatass".

South Korea’s Defense Minister resigned following North Korea’s surprise artillery attack. He is now working for the Cincinnati Bengals.

Michigan Congressman John Conyers was caught on video reading a Playboy Magazine on an airplane. It turns out, it was just the guide to the TSA.

A French woman was rescued after being trapped in her bathroom for three weeks. Even more stunning: someone put the seat down.

A survey says that 40% of Americans cut back on their Thanksgiving meal. The other 60% are obese.

Bristol Palin says that God was on her side at “Dancing With The Stars”. To be fair, it was a miracle that she made it to finale night.

President Obama pardoned a pair of turkeys from, as he called it, a November shellacking. It turns out, one of them was John Boehner.

A village in India has banned unmarried women from using cell phones. Of all countries to have a place that bans cell phones from people, it's the country that gives us tech support.

Disney has a new 3-D movie coming out called “Tangled”. It's about those headphones you left in your pocket all day.

AND FINALLY, SOME INTERESTING BALLOONS AT THE MACY'S THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE
-The Ricky Martin balloon was not there because it was in the closet
-The TSA balloon rubbed up on all the other balloons

That's all I have for today! More tomorrow!