"Bomb-Resistant Boxers"

A study says that alcohol abuse is responsible for 4% of the deaths world wide every year. It would really be ironic if someone gave a toast at that funeral.

Arnold Schwarzenegger says he plans to return to make movies. This is great news for both of his movie fans.

A poll says that 35% of Americans say the country’s most important problem is unemployment. The other 65% have a job.

The Department of Agriculture says the cost of raising a child is $286,000, not including college. And for me, that's just the cost of food.

Charlie Sheen talked to the UCLA baseball team and told them to “stay off crack and drink chocolate milk.” In Charlie Sheen language, that means "Don't do anal and have sex with a black chick".

Lindsay Lohan says she was not raised to lie, cheat or steal. If that's the case, her parents did one crappy job.

Moody’s has given Playboy’s corporate debt a B-2 rating. When Hugh Hefner heard the rating, he thought he got bingo.

Bomb resistant boxers are being manufactured by a New York company. Aren't those called "diapers".

Two horses collapsed and died under mysterious circumstances Saturday before a race. At least they didn't die a painful death. Their jockeys were going to be Oprah Winfrey and Kirstie Alley.

That's all I have for today! More tomorrow!