"A Round Of Golf"

Joe Biden, John Boehner, and Ohio Governor John Kasich will play a round of golf together. Three men of power, one Democrat, two Republicans, a guy who never shuts up, a guy who won't stop crying, and a former Wall Street worker, are all hanging out with golf clubs in their hands. I think I speak for all Americans when I say, "What could possibly go wrong?".

June 13 is the Olsen twins' birthday. Fittingly, there will be no birthday cake.

Singer Selena Gomez was rushed to a hospital with nausea following an appearance on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno”. She became nauseous when she realized that she's dating Justin Bieber.

Mike Tyson and Sylvester Stallone were inducted into the International Boxing Hall of Fame. They were also permanently banned from the International Public Speaking Hall of Fame.

Harrison Frazar won his first PGA Tour title in his 355th tournament attempt. And that was on the video game.

Now that Osama bin Laden is dead, who is the most hated man in America? Well, I think it's the guy who showed Anthony Weiner how to use a camera.

Rapper Fat Joe recently lost 88 pounds. Now, his friends call him "Joe".

A poll rates Americans as the funniest people in the world, with Germans the least funny. And conveniently enough, my ancestors came from Germany.

The Federal Reserve wants more banks to divulge their finances. If only banks had finances to begin with.

3-D images reveal how the brain loses consciousness. To be fair, though, it's just a Polaroid picture of a beer bottle.

Well, that's all I have for today! More tomorrow!